Naming Your Demons

I got a call at 7 am this morning from one of the neurologists at WBAMC. She was able to fight the system and get the Huntington's Disease test approved for TODAY ONLY! She put a call into Quest Medical, who owns Tricare, and got the approval from them. The test is an approved and covered test by Quest, its Tricare themselves who have elected to not cover that test. Well boo on you Tricare, we went over your heads and straight to your boss.

So Mike is on his way right now to get his blood drawn before 1:30 when Quest does their pickup at our hospital.

This is one of those things that has you split in half, 50% of you is praying that the test is negative and the other 50% of you is praying it is positive.

The positives of it being negative: There is the obvious reason that it means he isn't dying of Huntington's Disease. And it means that our children will not inherit this genetic disease from him.

The positives of it being positive: We will finally know what it is that is slowly deteriorating him and we will better know how to treat him moving forward. And we will immediately know what our children are struggling with if they start to show symptoms as well - no going through this unknown like we have had to with Michael. Also, being able to just put a name on your demons makes it easier to process and live with. You can tell people "he has Huntington's Disease", instead of  "I don't really know what's wrong with him.... sorry". And, he could still be dying from some other degenerative disease - so why not at least know the name of the one that is killing him?


So there is a positive to either outcome, and a negative to either outcome. When we have the final answer, the biggest thing will be how we choose to view and live with the outcome. We can make either work, because that's what love and family does. And either answer will not break us and will not make us fall and fail - for His eye is on even the sparrow, so I know He's watching me.